The beginning

I came from an influence that said "men can fend for themselves!", but those ladies that had been married a long time, and the couples seemed to like each other, those ladies doted on their men.  So, I though the right thing to do, especially since he wanted me to be a housewife, was to do those doting wife things. 
Even though I was not a morning person, I got up with Him, and fixed him breakfast every morning, and every morning he would leave without eating.  I asked him what time he wanted dinner, and he said "about 5:30", so I worked hard to have dinner ready no later than that, but he never came home  until at least 6, sometimes as late as 7.  And if I asked (I admit I wasn't very kind in my asking, but I was worried and scared that something happened to him when he didn't come home on time) where he was, and why he hadn't come home on time, his answer was always someone had come in or called and needed his help. Though he would never tell me who, or what kind of help, and he never once called to let me know he was running late.  Then every night after dinner, he would sit in his chair with a quilt hugged up to his chin, and shiver.  I remember one night, the first week we were home, looking at him, I thought he looked like he regretted the life choice he had just made (marrying me)

After we were married 6 weeks the girl (who was in the youth group and my bridesmaid), and her family had some major drama, that resulted in us having all 4 of the kids in our home for a few nights, and when the two older children refused to go home (they were old enough to make that stand), I begged Brad to let them stay with us. I knew he loved those kids as his own (He'd said so), and I thought maybe welcoming them in to our home, would communicate to him, how much I loved him and wanted to be a part of his life.
He agreed to let them stay for a while, and life became what I had imagined it would.  We got up every morning and ate breakfast together, the four of us.  And he came home for dinner on time every night. And even though the boy and I clashed some (nothing big, really, but since I was only 6 years older than him, he didn't think I had a right to have authority over him, and Brad saw no reason to correct him), life was exactly what I had expected it to be (even if the devotions Brad tried to do at breakfast, were boring, at least it was happening)
The kids lived with us for 12 weeks, then the girl went to live with her aunt, and the boy moved in with our pastor.  I don't know how that all came to pass, I was just informed that it was happening when it happened.  And as soon as the kids were moved out, everything stopped.  No more breakfasts together, no more devotions together, no more home for dinner time. it all stopped as fast as flicking a switch, and I took it personally.